Jo Jeeta Wohi Sikandar

There are few things in life which give us as much joy as listening to those magic words ‘You have won’. Often it’s not that direct. Often, it’s some form of recognition, right from a little mention of our name to people that matter, or an email, or a smile and a nod which reaffirms, which all translate into that feeling of victory. And it’s addictive. This feeling. This knowing you are appreciated for what you did. But to get there becomes the aim for most of us. No one aims to perform a mediocre job. It’s that simple. No one aims to fail. Most of us aim success, overwhelming, brilliant, shimmery, shining, success. It’s what we crave in jobs, in exams, it’s how we are wired. Success means survival. More so in today’s world. Where everywhere, everyone is competing like crazy, basic needs are no longer the priority, success is a basic need for survival. But with so many people fighting over that limited resource called success how can you ensure it every time? How can you sleep with a peaceful mind when all you think about is beating the competition? When the road to your success is simply competition, how do you even form any sane human relationship with your competitors?

There are many perceptions crowded around this concept of ‘success’ and ‘competition’ and although I don’t overthink about those, I think success should be as personal as public. It can’t be something others define for you. Not always. You can’t consider you achieved something, anything, simply because you followed a direction everyone told was right. For there is really no such thing as right direction, unless it’s something involving basic ethics. It’s more of a question of what’s right for you, rather, what path will you enjoy. Once you define your goals personally, which is a difficult job in itself, define what success really means to you, you might come to the grand realization that your only competition is with yourself. That the only person who you need to be better than is yourself. Since how can you be sure that the people outside, who you are trying to be better than are not even as good as you. Having said that, it’s not to say that you keep yourself in that comfortable bubble of oblivion, happily progressing at your own pace. But there’s that difference with being over obsessed at being better than ‘xyz’ and being aware of their qualities and learning from them. That’s when you tap the devil in you, try all sorts of mad behavior just to show them, and yourself and everyone who’s better. That’s when you introduce unhealthiness in your relationship. Which is far too common and far too ugly, and giving instances of that would really spoil this article. But to beat that, but to cope with the fact that stuff like that happens all I can say is, charity begins from home, you set an example people would look up to. Especially if one is in a position of authority, power, and wants to avoid ugly competition, you make sure you recognize each and every one for anything little and big they did. For to progress as a team, each little and big player needs to feel they are getting better. That their work matters. But it’s a hard thing to be able to see that need in people, be it people working with you, or the ones you lead, if you are too obsessed with your own goals. Your definition of success needs to overlap if not just compose of the definition of success for the people you try to lead, not just in thoughts, in actions. I mention this point here as understanding competition is not necessary at just an individual level, but at a team level. It’s about understanding that contrary to a popular proverb, not everything is fair in war.

 

 

But having said this, in all fairness, competition is responsible for a lot of awesome stuff humans do. Maybe that’s the reason why it’s an instinct. By trying to be better than yourself or others or both, everyone drives progress. At a bird’s eye view, if you were not a part of the competition, you can see how awesome it is for everyone, although often turning frustrating. Take a reality show for example. If people were not pitted against each other, would they really turn out to be better after it’s over than when they entered? Of course few would also turn bitter, sarcastic, egoistic. Yet, for the things they are competing, they set standards for everyone else to follow.

 

This is an intriguing topic and deserves a longer rant which will come when I get more perspective. Let me know yours!